The last quarter of '01 brought along a slew of changes to my HT. I was home a lot due to illness, and there's nothing like having to stay home to make you realize that things need to be done! (yes, we CAN ignore that old wallpaper when we're at work all the time...)Even tho I am an interior designer by trade, we tend to be so burned out by having to work on others' homes that ours gets little thought (like the cobbler's kids who have no shoes!) What really started affecting the HT was the chain reaction from making changes in another room...especially in regards to furniture being moved around. It seems as tho our homes take on a personality after we've reached a certain age (or perhaps it's after you've been married a skillion years and accumulated/sifted/replaced/honed/resigned to certain furniture and things which you cannot dispose of?). Whether we are bound by "antiques" (and I use this loosely...old family pieces are usually called this whether deserving of the term or not) which we inherited, early-marriage furniture that's not bad enough to pitch but we're tired of, or just bad buying errors from the past, we all seem to have certain pieces we have to work around. Sometimes these are monstrous and really hard to deal with (like my husband's family's church organ in my living room...crowded in with a grand piano...call it a "music room", not a "living room"). More often they are simply not what we would ordinarily pick were we to choose today. It seems the only souls I know in their 40's that have the more lean, useful furniture without clutter have been thru a divorce to clean it out..and I'm certainly not advocating that route to rid yourself of unwanted belongings! So, most of us shuffle these pieces from room to room, trying to work out "the solution".
I've become aware of a very definite philosophical change in my attitude toward my home in my late 40's. Up until 40 it seems my major goal regarding my home was to upgrade and tweak it up to a look and comfort level that was judged according to my parent's level of decor.As I started making meaningful money I headed into the usual land of better furniture, oriental carpets, etc. Along with the upgrades came a shift into that which was more formal. Perhaps I equated the look of "Traditional Home" and "Southern Living", etc. to that of success within my own life. Perhaps because this is what my parents aspired to, I felt I should also. For whatever reason, one day, when you are about 40-45, you start noticing that your home is finally coming together and looking darn "good", and your comfort level is nice. BUT, this does not necessarily mean that you're totally happy with the overall plan. As I neared my mid-forties I started to become aware of nagging little undercurrents of discontent...as if the home were lovely, but not necessarily what I wanted.( And while always preaching to my clients to "make their homes fit their lifestlyes, and not vice versa"...I rarely apply my own advice to my own lfestlye!) Many of our friends who experienced this went out and built another home in a more open style or differing style to assuage these feelings of wanting something "different", but due to my health problems this is not a good idea for me (a new huge mortgage will not help pay the medical bills). SO, you start looking within your home to see what changes you'd really like to make.
Perhaps my biggest "mistake" was to over-dress the family room (which is now the HT). I bought furniture of as high a quality as my living room, and altho the color scheme is less formal and the materials more durable (chenilles, cottons, etc)it still had orientals, solid-cherry furniture, nice brass lamps. I also invested ten years ago in an expensive Thomasville 8ft. wall unit which really pulled the "traditional" look together. I go the hub an expensive leather chair and ottoman. All this was fine-and-dandy, but I noticed we no longer partied as much in that room, we stopped having many parties because we got paranoid about people spilling things on the orientals, etc. The family itself drifted away from using that room much and it sat there, pretty, but pretty much ignored.
Where did we "hang"?? Upstairs, in a fourth bedroom that used to be a nursury, where old furniture and the computer had migrated! I have a twin bed, an OLD club chair and ottoman, and a TV along with the computer. Perhaps I'm blaming the furnishings/decor unfairly and the real reason we all migrated to this tiny cramped mess was because my body was on the computer so much and the men in my life would not see much of me otherwise. BUT, I also think the fact that it was "comfortable", that it actually bordered on sloppy-comfortable was a big part of the reason that we all used that room so much.
It really did not occur to me until about 18 months ago that we all had changed over to staying in this little room all the time. The large, formal living room (aka "music room") went unused. The dressy family room sat silent, even tho the largest TV was in that room. So I started a slow process of re-thinking my home and how we live in it.
It seemed I was bound in my soul to having certain uses for certain rooms. The real waste is the formal dining room, with a fortune tied up in a crystal chandalier, elegant table and chairs, etc that SIT there other than the 12-or-so formal dinners I give a year. We have a separate "dinnette" we used everyday beside the kitchen, so the formal dining area just sits, and sits. I won't address that room in this chapter as I have not come to grips with altering that room YET..but in the future , who knows..
But I did start rolling along on the den..albeit slowly. First I upgraded the Pro Logic setup and went DD/DTS. That brought the family back into "movie-mode", as we were never that enthralled with Pro Logic. Getting a better subwoofer also seemed to add to my men enjoying the movies more. Then, I changed around last summer to a two-row arrangement, with a double recliner in front and an elevated sofa behind, adding dimmed movie lighting and reducing clutter. At first it was OK...but a real drag when other couples or friends would join us as only two could sit up front. This was really brought to mind this fall when another couple came to visit for a month..my neck ached from some of us having to constantly crane our necks to talk to others. By the time they left Nov 1 I realized the two-row arrangement could not stay IF I were to continue to use the room for anything other than HT. And we do use this room to listen to music...and as of late we are getting into vinyl again, which entails sitting and really listening (remember..you have to be there to put on and take off an album!) So I realized it was time for some MAJOR changes. Not just surface things to "tweak" it a bit, but some major overhauls to bring this space I call my home more into alignment with the way I REALLY live my life. Instead of my home LOOKING as I felt it should, I wanted it to FIT MY LIFESTYLE as it really IS. My kid is grown now (18) and does his "own thing", so it really is just my hub and I again. And how do we live? We are the typical workaholics (we love what we do) who are not home a lot (we both run two businesses) and when we are home, we eat too much, listen to music, watch some TV/movies, and fall into exhaustion. With this in sight, I determined to start into a new "phase" of my life..one in which my material possessions would enhance my lifestyle, instead of hindering it.
As this tome has reached gargantuan proportions, I'll continue this thread in my next installment.I'll try to show pics along the way as this is certainly not totally accomplished yet and will be ongoing thru the next year or two. I have in the last month made some very significant changes. It is a NEW DAY, and a NEW WAY.
Susan
I've become aware of a very definite philosophical change in my attitude toward my home in my late 40's. Up until 40 it seems my major goal regarding my home was to upgrade and tweak it up to a look and comfort level that was judged according to my parent's level of decor.As I started making meaningful money I headed into the usual land of better furniture, oriental carpets, etc. Along with the upgrades came a shift into that which was more formal. Perhaps I equated the look of "Traditional Home" and "Southern Living", etc. to that of success within my own life. Perhaps because this is what my parents aspired to, I felt I should also. For whatever reason, one day, when you are about 40-45, you start noticing that your home is finally coming together and looking darn "good", and your comfort level is nice. BUT, this does not necessarily mean that you're totally happy with the overall plan. As I neared my mid-forties I started to become aware of nagging little undercurrents of discontent...as if the home were lovely, but not necessarily what I wanted.( And while always preaching to my clients to "make their homes fit their lifestlyes, and not vice versa"...I rarely apply my own advice to my own lfestlye!) Many of our friends who experienced this went out and built another home in a more open style or differing style to assuage these feelings of wanting something "different", but due to my health problems this is not a good idea for me (a new huge mortgage will not help pay the medical bills). SO, you start looking within your home to see what changes you'd really like to make.
Perhaps my biggest "mistake" was to over-dress the family room (which is now the HT). I bought furniture of as high a quality as my living room, and altho the color scheme is less formal and the materials more durable (chenilles, cottons, etc)it still had orientals, solid-cherry furniture, nice brass lamps. I also invested ten years ago in an expensive Thomasville 8ft. wall unit which really pulled the "traditional" look together. I go the hub an expensive leather chair and ottoman. All this was fine-and-dandy, but I noticed we no longer partied as much in that room, we stopped having many parties because we got paranoid about people spilling things on the orientals, etc. The family itself drifted away from using that room much and it sat there, pretty, but pretty much ignored.
Where did we "hang"?? Upstairs, in a fourth bedroom that used to be a nursury, where old furniture and the computer had migrated! I have a twin bed, an OLD club chair and ottoman, and a TV along with the computer. Perhaps I'm blaming the furnishings/decor unfairly and the real reason we all migrated to this tiny cramped mess was because my body was on the computer so much and the men in my life would not see much of me otherwise. BUT, I also think the fact that it was "comfortable", that it actually bordered on sloppy-comfortable was a big part of the reason that we all used that room so much.
It really did not occur to me until about 18 months ago that we all had changed over to staying in this little room all the time. The large, formal living room (aka "music room") went unused. The dressy family room sat silent, even tho the largest TV was in that room. So I started a slow process of re-thinking my home and how we live in it.
It seemed I was bound in my soul to having certain uses for certain rooms. The real waste is the formal dining room, with a fortune tied up in a crystal chandalier, elegant table and chairs, etc that SIT there other than the 12-or-so formal dinners I give a year. We have a separate "dinnette" we used everyday beside the kitchen, so the formal dining area just sits, and sits. I won't address that room in this chapter as I have not come to grips with altering that room YET..but in the future , who knows..
But I did start rolling along on the den..albeit slowly. First I upgraded the Pro Logic setup and went DD/DTS. That brought the family back into "movie-mode", as we were never that enthralled with Pro Logic. Getting a better subwoofer also seemed to add to my men enjoying the movies more. Then, I changed around last summer to a two-row arrangement, with a double recliner in front and an elevated sofa behind, adding dimmed movie lighting and reducing clutter. At first it was OK...but a real drag when other couples or friends would join us as only two could sit up front. This was really brought to mind this fall when another couple came to visit for a month..my neck ached from some of us having to constantly crane our necks to talk to others. By the time they left Nov 1 I realized the two-row arrangement could not stay IF I were to continue to use the room for anything other than HT. And we do use this room to listen to music...and as of late we are getting into vinyl again, which entails sitting and really listening (remember..you have to be there to put on and take off an album!) So I realized it was time for some MAJOR changes. Not just surface things to "tweak" it a bit, but some major overhauls to bring this space I call my home more into alignment with the way I REALLY live my life. Instead of my home LOOKING as I felt it should, I wanted it to FIT MY LIFESTYLE as it really IS. My kid is grown now (18) and does his "own thing", so it really is just my hub and I again. And how do we live? We are the typical workaholics (we love what we do) who are not home a lot (we both run two businesses) and when we are home, we eat too much, listen to music, watch some TV/movies, and fall into exhaustion. With this in sight, I determined to start into a new "phase" of my life..one in which my material possessions would enhance my lifestyle, instead of hindering it.
As this tome has reached gargantuan proportions, I'll continue this thread in my next installment.I'll try to show pics along the way as this is certainly not totally accomplished yet and will be ongoing thru the next year or two. I have in the last month made some very significant changes. It is a NEW DAY, and a NEW WAY.
Susan
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